Just Taking A Little Inventory

So the past couple of mornings I've been going back and reading my journal that I've been keeping solidly for about the past 3 years (Joy always encouraged me to journal-she said it'll always be there so don't feel bad about not writing in it for awhile, just start again) so that's the advice I've taken and ran with it.

Anyway, the point is...I realized...unfortunately I wasn't happy for a very long time. Well, overall, I was happy I suppose, and maybe I was only unhappy when I wrote in my journal...but there aren't the happiest of themes going on in there. There were parts- i.e. my time in Chile, my sister and friend's weddings, Obama's election, etc, that stood out as amazing times but...generally speaking I think I was merely surviving and existing day to day. UNTIL two summers ago when I came to visit NYC...and everyone knows how well that went.

Not to say that life is peachy-keen right now (cuz we know it's not) but even with all the bad stuff that's happened, and the bad days that I have...I know I'm not just surviving and existing...I'm living, like really living my life the way I want-the way that makes me happy. And with that comes happier entries and a happier existence. Of course I get sad, stressed out, scared, etc, etc, etc but I've noticed that it only lasts for a moment. I give love, I have love in my life. And to be honest. This world is full of really nice and giving people and I keep meeting them ALL!!

For real tho...there is a new printer/copier/scanner/fax machine in my apartment AND a ticket to see Kevin Hart in April on my refrigerator and they were both GIFTS!!! AND!!! I've been taught how to edit videos using Final Cut Pro and guess what I got today? My own edition so I can use it on my computer AS. A. GIFT!!!

So what am I saying? I'm really trying not to brag because it has absolutely NOTHING to do with me and EVERYTHING to do with the goodness of God and the goodness of people. I sincerely trust and believe that everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, then it's not the end.

I'm saying...when you're happy (and I finally am-because I've decided to be) that things will continue to happen to bring happiness to you. At least that's what's happening in my life. You can't continue to be in situations, relationships, jobs, cities, etc that are making you miserable...honestly ask yourself...don't you deserve better? Don't you deserve to be happy? It's your life...and it's a short one...how long until you decided that you're worth it? It honestly took me about two and a half years. But I got here...and I still have a ways to go. And yes...sometimes it's hard to believe that everything is gonna be ok when I'm bawling my eyes and my stomach is twisting into unbelievable shapes. But after that moment passes, the tears stop, I have a popsicle, and someone talks me down off the ledge, I realize that I'm doing what I love. I have people in my life that love me and support me. I'm healthy. And really, it's not that bad.

I really don't know why I'm on a soap box tonight but I am. I'm just really grateful today. Thankful for the gifts, thankful for love, and thankful I paid my rent :) Anything else just really ain't that bad!

So...check out this video that I had help making by the oh-so-fabulous Emiliano Styles over at http://soulploitation.com/



AND!! It's finally here!!! The website you've been waiting for! MINE!!! It's finally finished and ready for you to send me a message!!! www.lenorecoer.com it was designed by my friend Jocelyn Leveille over at http://jocelyn2k.com/

All for now...remember to live! "The value in your life comes from your desire to live it in your own special way."

Back to Basics...Living Truthfully Under Imaginary Circumstances

So last night I had my first day of school. Like for real, very first day all over again. No I'm not leaning to be a brain surgeon, but this is my career, acting is what I want to do with my life...so I'm taking the time, making the investment to go back to school. I'm not going full-time which I kinda wish I was able to do (be a real college kid again) but I'm a grown -up and have responsibilities (and face it I have bills and I like to shop) so part-time is the way to go. It's going to be a long, hard, expensive journey...not as expensive as Sewanee...but it will all pay off. For right now, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday nights are out for me...don't call, I won't answer. Don't drop by..I won't be home. And on the evenings where I'm not in class, I have to be doing my homework...aka rehearsing with my scene partner. They call it an intensive and that is what it is, intensively taking away all my time. So respect it and understand it.

Key notes from class:

~Good actors really do and don't pretend, bad actors indicate (pretend to have a feeling)

~Hard to do something to the audience that you don't really feel

~Class is a laboratory...ur not here to get it right, ur here to learn

~It takes time to produce something-right ingredients, right care, and time

~Seed, soil, water, space, sun, and time-same ingredients needed to grow a head of cabbage and a mighty oak tree.

Last night was fun. It was informative and I met some of my classmates. But literally it was like the first day of school. No one knew each other, you were concerned about what to wear if anyone would like you (well maybe that's just me...idk) and our main goal of the evening was listening and responding. But really focusing on not pretending but really doing. Really listening, really responding. Which I don't' think many people do anymore.

I've always been a good listener, people usually like to talk to me because I do just that. But here's the problem...when I listen I don't talk. So people always question am I there, am I really listening. YES! I want to scream (but I don't', that would be rude) You listen with your ears not your mouth. I don't' have to talk until you're done...I will express myself, believe me I will...but u go ahead and say whatever it is that you need to say...I am listening. When did listening become who can talk the loudest or which person has to be right? No thanks...I'd rather go listen to someone else then who appreciates my listening skills.

Anywho...as you know I've read The Secret...but I've recently started reading Happiness Is...by Pastor AR Bernard and each week ur supposed to read a chapter and reflect on it. Best way to keep me doing that is for you to keep me in line. So this week was the intro and the first chapter. Key notes: Well better yet...here's the link where you can buy it and/or read an excerpt from the chapters.

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Happiness-Is/A-R-Bernard/e/9781416549406#EXC

Happiness is....

Accepting God's Abundance

I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.

-- John 10:10 NKJV

God offers us abundance, but He doesn't force it upon us. He promises that we "might have life" and that we "might have it more abundantly." And how, precisely can we claim that abundance? By obeying God and following His Son, that's how!

When we commit our hearts, our days, and our work to the One who created us, we experience spiritual abundance. But when we focus our thoughts and energies, not upon God's will for our lives, but instead upon our own unending assortments of earthly needs and desires, we inevitably forfeit the spiritual abundance that might otherwise be ours. Today and every day, seek God's will for your life and follow it.

Today, turn your worries and your concerns over to your Heavenly Father. Today, seek God's wisdom, follow His commandments, trust His judgment, and honor His Son. And while you're at it, get rid of that critical voice inside your head -- the little voice that tells you you're never quite good enough. When you do these things, you'll receive God's abundance...and you'll be happy.Great Ideas About Abundance

God loves you and wants you to experience peace and life -- abundant and eternal.
-- Billy Graham

We honor God by asking for great things when they are a part of His promise. We dishonor Him and cheat ourselves when we ask for molehills where He has promised mountains.
-- Vance Havner

Greatness occurs when your children love you, when your critics respect you, and when you have peace of mind.

-- Quincy Jones

God is the giver and we are the receivers; and it is not to those who do great things, but to those who "receive abundance of grace, and of the gift of righteousness," that richest promises are made.
-- Hannah Whitall Smith

You can have it all. You just can't have it all at once.
-- Oprah Winfrey

More from God's Word

And God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need and plenty left over to share with others.
-- 2 Corinthians 9:8 NLT

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
-- Matthew 7:7-8 NIVA

Simple Step

Abundance and obedience go hand in hand. Obey God first and expect to receive His abundance second, not vice versa.

I figured some of y'all wouldn't follow the link so I just copied and pasted it from Amazon HA!

Lastly, I leave you with this (for right now)

Your life story is being written one day at a time...with God's help, that story can-and will-be a masterpiece.

You think that's dope huh? Ha! I didn't write it! It's from the book!! Go get it!!

Happy Thursday :)